Monday, October 27, 2008
Finger lickin bad
"Come on- You know you don't wanna eat me... I may be tainted with melamine...I am full of transfat, with ample calories you won't be able to burn off in a century... seriously In fact after eating me you'll turn out like this...."
"No kidding. And I was left out there so long with flies hopping over me you'd puke if you're able to see me under the 'bug magnifier lenses' I happen to have.
"Having second thoughts? Good... hear me out here will you, let me catch a breath of methane gas and get back to you. yup that's what they made me with. you know with unburnt hydrocarbons and such..."
"-and that's all just talking about my exterior... Inside, I'm worse off. I'm filled with Aflatoxin harbouring, heatiness causing peanut butter. You see, butter is part of the word. Butter comes from Milk right? And that's where more melamine could be.. you should really think twice before doing the wrong thing. I am bad for your health"
"In fact, I am such a bad thing that I am exactly what they serve up in the ISA holding centres. You know- food unfit for dogs? No I'm not degrading myself here, I'm trying to save my.. I mean your life here. Can't you see? I'm doing this for you. There's nothing in this for me!"
"No I am not a Somalian Pirate. But I am poison."
"What am I supposed to be? (what? you haven given up yet?)
"I'm actually a dorayaki. I am contorted because I'm an unhealthy dorayaki"
"If you eat me you'll turn blue and your hands will become round and your fingers will drop off. If fact you'll start growing whiskers. Most important of all you'll become round and fat. you don't want that do you? let me illustrate
"Waitttttt!!!!... Noooooooo!!!!!... Please!!!!!....
"Pass my will to dunkin donuts, Big apple and J-CO don...."