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Thursday, July 17, 2008


Going through one of the most stressful and tiring phases of my life...
I know those who are close have noticed that I have changed... This time for the worse.

Well, I'm the sort who used to take everything in my stride, hardly being affected by situations and conditions where I can remain happy go lucky no matter what...

Then I realised that I may be bottling up a lot of unexpressed feelings all this while...so much so that when I reach the boiling point I pop the cap off sky high. I think, I actually enjoyed being angry at one point. The reason, (on hindsight) is no longer having to keep everything inside feels so refreshing. I can lash out at someone at will instead of you know...-Being taken advantage of, seething inside whilst putting on a smiling face outside-... Not having to restrain my emotions feels really good.

That is... until I realise how much it affects the people around me.
They don't say it out loud but then I can see how their image of me has changed. I know I don't need to be a crowd pleaser but then knowing that people restrain themselves around you isn't exactly enjoyable.

So... what next?
I'm not exactly sure but I know I must strike a balance between being a punchbag and a crown of thorns...
Starting with
1) Learning how to breathe
2) Relax, take a step back and think before uttering anything to prevent the foot-in-
mouth syndrome
3) Time management, stress management,
4) prioritization
5) reestablish my circle of friends...my safety net
6) Mingle with my housemates into a dough!

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